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How to Support a Woman After a Miscarriage

How to Support a Woman After a Miscarriage

Miscarriage affects a woman physically and emotionally. It affects almost every aspect of her life and her relationships with others. Women who miscarry frequently experience loss and sadness on par with those who have suffered significant losses. In the weeks, months, or years after a miscarriage, it’s typical to have clinical levels of anxiety, despair, and post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD).

When it comes to helping women who have experienced a miscarriage, family, friends, and medical professionals are crucial; what they say or don’t say to her can have a long-lasting effect. Seeing a friend, relative, or spouse go through this process may be disheartening when you do not know what to do and how to support them. 

While miscarriage gifts can be helpful, there are other ways to show support to a woman after a miscarriage. Based on the experience, life stories of others, and thorough research, we will share with you the different ways to support a woman after a miscarriage. 

What to do to Support a Woman After a Miscarriage

Pay close attention

Listen to them attentively as she may need someone to pour out her heart to during this period. While she may speak to you directly, she may chat with you or tell you how she feels over a call.  Show your concern by being alert, making gestures, and eye contact.  

Encourage her to vent their tension and pain

The typical grieving and healing process occurs due to dealing with emotions including anger, guilt, sadness, doubt, and frustration. Encourage communication with her. Recognize that each person’s experience of grief is unique and untimed. 

Acknowledge her loss

Even though you might be concerned that what you say will offend them more, saying nothing is worse. It may give her the impression that you don’t care or that her loss is unimportant. You should however be careful of what to say to her after the miscarriage. Simply saying, “I’m sorry about your miscarriage,” will do.

Encourage them to speak with other miscarriage survivors

Women frequently learn that others nearby have also experienced miscarriages only after they start talking about their own. It can be quite comforting for someone to know they’re not alone and that others understand how they’re feeling.

Reassure her that her feelings and reactions are normal

She may decide to vent or keep quiet, sometimes she may feel she is overreacting or not reacting the right way. You should help her validate her feelings by reassuring her that her feelings and reactions are normal and she should express herself whenever and wherever. 

Be prepared to discuss the infant

Hearing the name mentioned by others aids in the grief process. Understand when to be quiet; there are moments when keeping quiet is preferable. Sometimes all someone in grief wants is to be heard.

Give useful assistance. 

Provide lunch or offer to stay with the other kids if they have other kids. Flowers and gifts convey your concern and acknowledgment of their loss. Remember that it is the thought that matters. 

Be Present 

The greatest present to give to a woman is to be present (No pun intended!). Be there for her, let her also know that you are there for her. She may reject your offer but you should not relent and continue telling her that you are there for her.

What You Should not do

We have listed the various ways to support a woman after a miscarriage, here are the different things you should not do:

Do not hurry the grieving process

She has to be able to deal with the grieving phase in her own time. Do not hurry the process by telling her what she should do and what she should not do. This only exacerbates the agony and feelings of loneliness, and inadequacy.

Don’t assign blame or give unsolicited advice.

The miscarriage may be a result of a complication or an issue but it is not your place to assign blame to anyone. Be understanding and considerate; avoid giving advice that can make her feel at fault.

Do not tell unnecessary jokes 

You may not know what to do and be feeling uncomfortable, telling a joke at this time may trigger her. Be considerate of her feelings.

How Can I Help my spouse Who Had a Miscarriage?

Early in pregnancy, women frequently develop a solid emotional bond. Miscarriages frequently occur before 20 weeks of gestation, so each spouse is likely to have a varied level of connection when the loss happens. 

The woman may question why her spouse doesn’t seem to care about the baby because the man’s primary worry is frequently the woman’s health and safety. They are in two distinct emotional places.

The fact that couples may experience the loss differently complicates matters further. Women frequently prefer communicating with loved ones, whereas men often seek out activities. The opposite is also possible: The woman can be eager to return to her job while the man may require time to process his loss. In any case, it is better to allow your spouse to express and deal with the grief in whichever way they want to. Give each other time, try talking about it together and spend time with each other. 



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